Friday, September 4, 2009

In which Skippy saves the day.

When one lives in the country, one must realize that, occasionally, one's home will be invaded by a creature that God never intended to be an indoor, domesticated pet. But then one gets used to having a husband around.

Later, one must realize that the ongoing critter invasion problem is compounded when one lives in a home with more holes, cracks, and crevices than a Happy Meal box that's been laying in a roadside ditch since Beanie Babies came with the cheeseburger. Our house's foundation is so decimated as a result of poor construction and the effects of weather, there could be a gang of homeless Amway salespeople living in there.

So we've had our share of crickets, bees, wasps, scorpions, spiders, and mice - the latter being my least favorite, and the animal most likely to get screamed to death by yours truly.

We've also been visited by skunks, coyotes, and copperheads, all of who seem to think they belong inside just as much as the husband and the mice. And these are the animals that make it necessary to have a dog to serve as an alarm system and protector.

Of course, you get what you pay for. Here's the dog we purchased at the StuffMart parking lot:
Skippy the Wonder Pug is cute and all, but I always figured the most he could do to protect us would be to eat crickets and maybe let an ant get lost in his wrinkles.
So you can imagine my surprise when Skippy actually alerted me to The Dangerous Thing that was recently lurking in our pantry.

Skippy's dining area is next to the pantry door, and he was just making a leisurely stroll over to his food bowl, probably hoping that someone had mistakenly dropped a carton of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey into it, when he spotted The Dangerous Thing peering at him with one of its monstrous eyes.

Well. To his credit, he didn't pee on the floor. No, Skippy jumped back several feet (which, in dog feet, was about 9 inches) and let loose with barking loud enough to wake the Pope or make a bear poop in the woods or whatever the analogy is. His call to action brought several of us running to the scene, with Danger Boy hoping that this would finally be the event that would call for him to discharge a real weapon upon said Dangerous Thing.

Our fear as we approached the pantry was almost palpable. And, here, my friends, is what we found:
That's right. Skippy was protecting us from a potato.

At least I can sleep soundly at night, knowing we won't be carbohydrated to death by a rogue spud.

11 comments:

Melodie said...

Well, it must give you peace of mind knowing you don't have to worry about being attacked in you sleep by killer potatoes!

Sam Armitage said...

The evil spud...

Sam Armitage said...

I remember that day. Maja

Keeley said...

Hahahahahaha!!!!!! Oh my sides hurt.


It's like the time where I saw a mouse and SCREAMED and ran and jumped up ON A CHAIR and SCREAMED some more.

Then looked to the dog...my protector....and he was fast asleep, having not even twitched. *sigh*.

Amanda said...

LOL You gotta love pugs (or at least that's what I keep telling myself.)

Sue said...

I'm laughing so much my belly hurts. A pug is not like real dog after all!

bensrib said...

Our American bulldog mix once refused to go in our backyard for days because of a log that was out there. And he freaks out at turtles. But last week on our nightly walk, he almost stepped on a copperhead. Why do I feed him?

B'ham said...

...Okay, it's a potato.
...BUT, it is a really Mean looking potato !
xoxo

Mostly Sunny said...

Ha ha ha! the pictures made the story. You've heard of the Saw movies. I think "Skippy" could start his own scary version called "Paw I" where he skins a potato...

JessBriggs said...

Wow...I needed that laugh.

Thank you.

Melissa @ Anxious for Nothing said...

Hee hee..."carbohydrated to death by a rogue spud." Love it. Found you through Kim at Life in a Shoe, by the way.