Friday, September 28, 2007

"... as was foretold by my oven."

Strange things are afoot in the TC house. The washing machine doesn't know when to stop filling, so it floods the laundry room. The oven has been making crackling noises and emitting white smoke (and that's before I put the food in).

Here's what I think. I think if God spoke to men through donkeys and burning bushes, He can darn sure speak to us through appliances. And that's what I told Rock 'n' Roll Daddy.

I said that I think God is sending us messages to leave Egypt (i.e., our money-pit of a house), and the sooner the better, because it's gonna be destroyed by fire or flood or some other disasterous plague-ish thing. He asked me how much caffeine I'd had that morning. I reminded him that a lot of the appliances in our house are from the Roosevelt administration. He asked me what that had to do with anything, so I told him that it's common knowledge that God didn't like FDR on account of his starting that communist Social Security program and all. He asked was I ready to wander in the wilderness (i.e., our back pasture) for 40 years, cooking over a campstove. I said - and I only raised my voice a little at this point - that that sounded good to me, as long as he would be content with eating manna (i.e., Beanie Weanies from a can) every day. Then one of the dogs urped up something that looked like a catfish in a mitten, so that was the end of that discussion. Personally, I think the catfish was another sign from God, but right then wasn't a good time to say that to Laban (i.e., Rock 'n' Roll Daddy).

All I know is this: if our copier starts randomly spitting out pictures of frogs or locusts, buddyroe, I am getting the heck out of Dodge.


Anonymous said...

Ummmmm, would you consider moving closer in to your friends? Or I guess a mobile home isn't out of the question in your neighborhood. I can bring you some leftover turkey Sunday (if there is any). And cookies!
I know Laban, er, Rock 'n' Roll Daddy, could build you a beautiful stove out of wood, but that creates another problem, huh?

CrossView said...

O yeah. I'm with you! RUN AWAY!
Far, far, away..

I've always said that I wouldn't mind pitching a tent on our dirt since it's paid for. But we MUST have a very long extension cord to keep the dishwasher! That's my only requirement....

TobyBo said...

jumped ship at HSB, eh? is that part of the out of Egypt plan, too?

Best wishes on getting Laban's attention. I am trying to do the same thing via a poll on my blog about whether a push lawn mower qualifies as a vehicle or not. But getting nowhere.

imasharp said...

I have those days here too. You just made it sound so much more fun.

Chris said...

Wow yeah time to move...or something yep :) i wish u all luck.

yeah and fyi FDR was like the best Pres ever IMHO :)

Tiffany said...

You are hillarious! I love your blog.

Kayla said...

TC- Too funny....I love when you me something to smile about...everyone misses you on HSB though!

pajamamama said...


My appliances are "acting up" too! So, you think its the Lord? How else would He be able to get my attention at midnight when I'm making dinner!?! I'll have to pray about that one. You funny, mom!

Bless you,

Lori (MiryClay) said...

What? Leave Agony Acres? I feel your pain. However, God hasn't yet tried speaking to me through my appliances. He has been talking to us alot lately through our old broken down vehicles though. I was thinking...yes, it was painful! LOL. Maybe when you asked your husband if he didn't mind eating manna, and then the dog hacked up that fish/mit know, that very well could have been his manna right there. Ewwwwwww...LOL.


Kelley said...

This is wonderful! I want to run away...maybe I should break my dishwasher. My hubby probably still wouldn't let us run away though.

Anonymous said...

I can't stop laughing!!!!! You are so funny. Seriously though I do hope you can get all your appliances up and running again soon.
~Christina aka giggles3 at HSB

lillinda said...

When my aunt's stove just wouldn't work no more, my uncle brought home a hot plate!
(He finally broke down and bought her a new stove as biscuits just don't cook up to well on a
hotplate !)